


Fears

by orphan_account



Series: Yours, Mine and Ours [2]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-30
Updated: 2016-04-30
Packaged: 2018-06-04 20:43:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6674839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jason realizes that sometimes in life, it worth taking the risk rather than to live in fear</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fears

**Author's Note:**

> i know that i'm supposed to write this in chronological order but i'm having a hard time in writing narrative rather than dialogue alone ;D  
> so have this quick update for a while ^^  
> btw this happened around a few days after the first segement

_“Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones.”_

–Thich Nhat Hanh

* * *

 

“Wow, you could totally pass as a hot dad.” Dick joked whilst approaching Jason and Damian, both are holding hands, as Jason was talking to Damian about feeding the ducks or something, Dick didn’t heard their full conversation. 

“And you look like shit.” Jason retorted, because in reality that’s what Dick really looked like, all disheveled and haggard but most importantly he looked—terrified. And Jason knew what ‘probably’ cause his face to look like that. He expected Dick to punch or scold him for what he did, after all he deserved it, but what he got was something that he didn’t deserved—a hug. 

“Don’t ever do that again.” Dick mumbles and hugs Jason tighter. “You made me scared you know!”

“Sorry about that but you needed rest.” That was all he could respond. Ever since he moved back here, Jason witnessed how Dick worked hard to earn money while being a parent to the brat. He just wanted to give Dick a break, seeing that when Dick came to his place earlier, he has instantly fallen asleep after sitting on the couch. “But I guess that didn’t work, huh?” he added not knowing where to put his hands, Jason lifted them as Dick mumbled incoherent into his chest, “You could have called you know!”

“Excuse what?”

“You could have called or even texted me that you’re the one who’s picking up Damian. I was so worried that maybe someone kidnapped him or Damian got in an accident or even worse—Bruce taking him back.” Dick confessed, now on the verge of crying. Shit…. He’s screwed, especially now that Dick lost his parents and the only family he got left is Damian. Jason knew how lonely it fells when you’re on your own, not having anyone to call as a family and he perfectly understands Dick’s fear of losing his son as well. After all Dick is the type of person who puts his family first above all things. 

“Oh god, don’t tell me you’re going to cry.” He snorts. 

“Of course not!” he protested. “Well…. I’ll try not to anyway….” Dick smiled as if he was trying to cheer himself, letting go of Jason and carried Damian into his arms. “I’m so sorry for not being able to pick you up at school today lil’ D.” he said as he planted a kiss on Damian’s forehead. “Was Uncle Jason being nice to you?”

The only response Damian gave him a ‘—Tt—‘

“I see.” He chuckled and started to walk. “Jason, aren’t you coming?” Dick looked back, noticing that Jason was still on the exact the same spot where he was earlier.

Jason stood still for a while. He looked at them as they were going further and further from his sight. Sighing he thought, _Dick lives in a constant fear of losing his family (again) and yet… he manages to smile and live his life happily as if nothing bad happens, he placed his fear aside and decided to continue on living…. But me, I’m the type of person who never forgets about the past—even though I live now, I still live in the past, not being able to move on. Because if I do move on, then maybe I’ll be rejected by the people around me and that’s the worst thing I ever wanted to feel._

_Rejection and falling in love_

_“Say Dick, what do you call the monster that lives in your chest. That haunts you in your sleep and taunts you when you’re awake. Hurting you when—“ the scared teenager barely contained his shaken hands when he was talking, suddenly a pair of warm and gentle hands envelopes his and with a smile Dick replied, “It’s called falling in love Jason.”_

_“Falling in love huh?” he muttered with a weak smile on his face as if he was pitying himself. “I’m really weak, aren’t I?” he asked himself._

_Compared to Dick, I’m just a coward who surrenders in his fears whenever they are presented in front of him. I’m just the guy who’s unable to move on with his life while others build themselves back up—to make their lives better than before. But me… even though I was given another chance to live again after dying once, I wasn’t able to say good bye to my former self. I’m still that scared kid who’s unable to convey his (real) feelings so lightly. No matter what I’ll do, I’ll always be that person. I will laways be pathetic._

**_“No you’re wrong”_ **

_“Huh?” the teenage Jason Todd was covering his face, not wanting his childhood friend to see him in his weakened state._

_“It’s perfectly normal to feel that way.” He says._

_“You mean, it’s normal to be afraid of loving someone?”_

_“That’s right. I mean, everyone has their own fears Jason and I for one also felt what you’re feeling right now. So how could you say that it’s not normal? That you’re pathetic for being afraid?”_

_“Really?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Then what did you do? To be so happy even though you’re afraid, I mean.”_

_With a bright smile, Dick looked at him and said, “It’s not simple but I looked at the sky and realized that…”_

Jason snapped back to reality, moving his legs forward. He decided to do something what he’d never thought of doing—facing his fears.

_“…The sky will continue to shine bright after a storm, flowers will continue to bloom after winter, seasons will continue to change and… that’s when I realized that the world around is still alive. It’s still living Jay, and you just can’t stop enjoying life just because you’re afraid. Sometimes in life, you just have to take the risk, you know?”_

Remembering what Dick had told him in the past, Jason followed suit where Dick and Damian were heading, then he…

“Jaybird?” the older man asked in a surprised tone as he felt large hands embrace him from the back.

I can’t live like this anymore, I just can’t. Jason thought and embraces Dick closer. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“You’ll be alright…” he mumbled beneath his breathes.

“Excuse me what?”

“You be alright, I promise!” Jason proclaims, this time his voice was full of determination. _This is the first step, I’ll be saying goodbye to the old me. I won’t be the scared little boy anymore. I am Jason frickin’ Todd and even if I’ll get rejected here, I won’t go back to the person who I used to be. Not now, not never._

“What are you talking about?” Dick lets out a small laugh as he touched Jason’s arms that are still locked in embrace.

“I’ll promise you that no one will ever take away your family from you Dick. I mean it!” he added that last part when Dick looked at him in the eyes. “I swear to you, that I won’t fail.”

The hands that were touching his, clenched but not too hard and not too painful with a smile—Jason never saw this kind of smile before, his smile looked weak but at the same time looked hopeful. “Thank you Jay.” he said.

Their hands intertwined with each other as Jason lets him go from his embrace. The three walked back home, side by side, holding hands.

 --- 

Extra:

“Oh yeah, we should stop at an ice cream shop today.”

“Why?”

“That’s because I told your brat that I will throw him in the pond if he won’t stop biting me but if he behaves, he can eat as many sundaes as he wants.”

 

“Ahhh… so that’s why you two looked so civil earlier.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> (i forgot to put in there the part where the teacher mistook Jason as Damian's father because Damian recognizes him and it only adds to Dick's suspicion that Damian was taken by Bruce since Damian's the only who calls Bruce father and other things but I'll get to that in the future) 
> 
> and ps, i can't put enough emphasis on the holding hands thing because it's important
> 
> Comments, kudos and critiques are always welcome! :)))


End file.
